Thursday, May 22, 2008

ruminations

At this point, four weeks into post-partum, I start to get antsy and ambitious. Things like running two errands at once, reading Hans Urs von Balthasar, making a three-pot dinner, and taking both girls biking and to Mass seem ... doable. And yet, I am still post-partum and sleep-deprived. The sights must be set lower: one errand at a time, frozen dinner, play in the yard, read half of Morning Prayer.

A smaller life is a radical gift.

The other evening, the Scientist Dad's fellowship program had a little dinner at a prof's house for the end of the semester. I ate with several PhD's--all women--and PhD candidates. They talked theories of sugar-use in the early Colonial era, biological bases for various diseases, and the ups and downs of research. Ah, the life of the scholar! Such attraction! And it is a good life. I loved that life.

But this time of little things is precious--fleeting, passing like dust (thank you, St. James!). I will be little for this time and here find my salvation.

2 comments:

Melanie B said...

Oh I know what you mean. I thought it was just me. Your ambition outpaces your body's ability to actually achieve.

Erika Ahern said...

Amen. It's so not just you!