Speaking of Jewish rappers, I've been compiling a list of things that help with the depression, pain, and irritability. At times, I want a cure (yes, a pill would be great), but I can also accept "daily bread," as in, "give us this day our daily bread."
"Simon wondered, as he took those beams upon his shoulders, why he was chosen for such a heavy burden, and now he knows. Help me, Jesus, to trust Your loving Providence as you permit suffering to weave itself in and out of my life. Make me understand that You looked at it and held it fondly before You passed it on to me. You watch me and give me strength, just as You did Simon. When I enter Your Kingdom, I shall know, as he knows, what marvels Your Cross has wrought in my soul." ~Mother Angelica.
This quote came in our EWTN monthly flyer. I have no idea where she wrote it or when, but yes. Thank you, Simon.
2. Finding more Simons. How many people I have carrying my cross with me! My husband, my parents, his parents, and my children. At first, I was sick with fear that my cross would crush them. But God has made them Simons (now, if I could just be more like the fallen Christ...).
3. Arise from Darkness, by Fr. Benedict Groeschel. My mom sent this book as a gift, and what a gift. This is a book for those in the dark, those caring for those in the dark, those afraid of the coming dark. He's real, he's a straight talker: "This book is not an answer but a guide to those in darkness. It is about going on in spite of darkness, about survival, and about using the unavoidable dark times of life to grow."
4. The wicked thief. You know, not Dismas. Yes, I've been feeling a lot like the wicked thief next to Christ on the Cross, "If you were really the Son of God, save me!" I love him, because now I have been him. And his words point right to Dismas's words, "Lord Jesus, remember me." During the day, it's always a toss-up which thief I'll be echoing. I'm just praying that my last prayer is Dismas's.
5. Company. I have been amazed at the company I keep: Thank you to everyone who has shared his or her own story of depression and/or chronic pain. This has been by far the greatest blessing--we are not alone.
6. Forgiveness. I've had to ask a lot of forgiveness lately. And dear friends have readily granted it.
7. Hot beverage break! Tea. Coffee. Hot milk. This is a physical ailment, and I thank God for physical consolations!
There are so many little things and thoughts that come during the day. Good things. Promises of Easter.